I would still consider myself to be a quiet person despite the fact my confidence has grown by leaps and bounds over the last few years. I’m confident enough to talk in front of groups of people and introduce myself to new people, I’m just not the loudest person there. I’m not the one shouting and jumping about making everything 2000 times more exciting that it really is but I wouldn’t call myself boring either. Whilst growing up I found myself to be much more of a shy person, due to this there were a lot of common sayings I would hear quite regularly, some of them I think did no help what-so-ever.
Here are the common things I got told whilst growing up:
Okay, I understand at one point there might have been a stereotype of loud people listening to rock and metal and quiet people listening to pop. BUT I think it’s one of the SILLIEST stereotypes ever if I’m honest, everyone can listen to whoever they want. It’s got to point now where I find it funny seeing people’s reactions when I tell them I listen to Letlive and Architects, I am not too girly for that!
This is one of those saying that I heard plenty of times as a child, not so much anymore though luckily. I found hearing this rather frustrating, I felt like saying ‘yes, I know they won’t bite and no I’m not afraid of them, ever thought that I don’t want to talk to them right now and I just want to be quiet, ay?’.
Whenever I heard this it always made me think of a tortoise, being weighed down by their home they’re carrying. The difference is nothing was weighing me down, I was light as a cloud, and I just didn’t want to bounce about making a fool of myself. I didn’t feel the need to be the first one to shout out ever answer in class, I was happy taking a little step back but I never saw any harm in that.
I didn’t hear this one as commonly but OMG DID THIS ANNOY ME! Yes, I’m quiet but get me around my friends or people I know well and I can chat for hours, I have no problem with that. I just didn’t go out of my way to make small talk with people I didn’t really need to, just kept myself to myself.
I remember being told a few years back now that I couldn’t do a certain job because I wasn’t loud, not by an employer, by a person I knew, knew not friends. This is only a retail job, they were like ‘that would involve too much confrontation’, I shrugged it off as I knew it was a load of rubbish but why would anyone even have the nerve to say that. I now work delivering sessions to groups of people which obviously must show I’m a fairly confident person, well at least when I need to be!
Let me know in the comments if you’ve been told any of these before or anything similar, I would love to hear!